![]() My own set is a humble pair of Nike slides, since anything toastier tends to make my feet feel like they’re wrapped in a fiery blanket of fluff. Now, my trusty house shoes stand between me and all that objectionable filth. And then where do you put those feet? On your couch to take a little nap? On the aforementioned coffee table? In your bed? What’s that about? Anyway, no matter who you are, your floor is disgusting, and you are raw-dogging it with your feet. There’s dust, too, which comes from nowhere at all. No-shoe policies, while great, don’t quite solve this problem, because you still have spills and crumbs coming from inside the apartment. ![]() It’s worse with hard floors, but even carpets have a habit of transferring some of their contents onto your foot. There’s dirt and particles from the ground outside coming in. Our floors are pretty gross if you think about it. ![]() Here’s why: When you walk around barefoot, your feet pick up stuff from your floor. Why would I want to put on a shoe in my own home? Going shoeless is a key part of being comfortable and at ease. Home is where you go to take off your shoes, to let your feet run free, to prop them on your coffee table next to a glass of wine while you watch The Bachelor. So when we sat down to discuss how we would meet in the middle, the first thing he said was, “I need you to get house shoes.” Cohabitating for the first time as a couple is famously rocky territory, and this was no truer than for us. I first became a house-shoe devotee during the very specific relationship milestone of booking a monthlong Airbnb with my significant other. Some people might have a more loosey-goosey interpretation of the term, but I don’t, and I’ll get to why in a minute. The bottom of a house shoe must never make contact with the ground outside of your own abode. A quick dog walk is not a house-shoe situation, nor is running downstairs to open the door for takeout. Because here, I wear house shoes.Ī house shoe, for the uninitiated, is a shoe you wear only (I repeat: ONLY) inside the house. But here, in my apartment, I have managed to wrest a modicum of control over the chaos of daily life. The COVID-testing line is around the block, Betty White is dead, and there’s not much we can do about everything being pretty awful. Photo: Found Image Holdings Inc/Getty Images
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